First Days

As everyone knows, babies don’t come with instruction manuals. Sure, there are tons of books out there that are supposed to tell you everything you need to know. And we read all the standards religiously when I was pregnant – What to Expect, Baby 411, The Vaccine Book, and my husband’s favorite, Dad Labs. But nothing can prepare you for that first night, especially with a high needs baby.

We were on a fairly quiet floor of the maternity ward. That is until we arrived. Madison could be heard from just about anywhere. When most babies were sleeping off their traumatic experiences, she was wide awake and commanding our attention. “She has great lungs” they would tell us – I thought, “that’s a good thing, right?”.

My husband and I had absolutely no idea what we were doing. Everything we had read over the past 9 months had completely left my brain – I felt totally clueless. Thank goodness my Mom was here to help us out at 3 a.m. Otherwise I don’t think we would have slept at all.

But even through those first virtually sleepless days and nights, listening to my baby cry and trying to figure out what to do, I kept looking at her in awe. This was my little person to love forever – and she will test that love often.